Monday, July 11, 2011

Breakups in a Post Apocalyptic world

Our world is like a small S**T Hole and facebook is just the reflection of it..just stumbled upon one of my good friend's X's profile..after a long relationship they had parted..they were a part of my very special memory and it hurts a lot when I see both of them with different people.This post might hurt them who has already been through such a situation, but my intention is to help them who are perhaps going through one or aren't ready to face the heat crisis and needs tips on that..I myself hate to see breakups..tried to stop as many as possible(with some success)..Sorry for the pain just in case but please understand that this one is for those who still has a chance.
Why breakups happen
Interestingly there are lots of theory and reasoning available, but however it really cant be predicted coz for everyone the reasons are different.In some cases it might be suggested that getting bored of relationship or finding some one better has led to breakup but was never really a true love in that case and so move on for a greener pasture(better person i mean).
The most common categorization  can be made on the basis of requirement.When one partner observes that his/her other half is ignorant and he/she is not getting what they expected can really lead to argument, fight and finally a breakup.Love in the essence means to give and not to expect anything in return.But in our modern day life..we sometime do expect something form them in return and when we don't get it, results in the first reason to have a a a few things that follow the disappointment phase..
  • They stop expecting and promises themself never to open up
  • They try to find an alternative to that expectation.
  • They fight over it sometimes winding back to the same phase with a bitter memory or can also successfully avert the situation.
Prevention is always better than cure

Coming to the point of prevention,perhaps the whole thing cant be summarized in just a post but can be boiled down to at least  few points…
  • Speak up:When in pain and sadness over some issue always choose to speak up.Don't stay mum fearing another quarrel or bad days but rather open up your mind to the other person.If you cant speak up try writing a email ,letter ..send them an audio/video recording..communicatespeak..
    • Do’s and Don'ts
      • Do Speak,write or record..but don't send an sms or chat.They hardly convey the real meaning and can lead to more confusion
      • Don't ask your best friend to do the job.They actually might try from their heart but may mess up more coz they really will say what they feel not what you intended to say.
      • Don't create a fuss about it and try to get his attention.I’ve seen people doing all sort of things to draw the attention and end up doing the stupidest thing ever done.
      • Don't pick up past issues.They only complicate the matter
  • Fight Up: When speaking doesn’t resolve roll up your sleeve and get into the fight.Chances are that you will end up saying and he will end up listening what you were trying to say.Even as psychologists say..releasing the emotion helps in better understanding and after all it is not wrong to fight for something you love. Battle_tnb
    • Do’s and Don’ts
      • Fighting should be strictly limited to you and not spread over the family and friends.Never know when someone might just take the advantage over it.
      • Once again it should be under reasonable grounds.Means since you are fighting..its not wise to hang out with someone else just to make him hurt or jealous..the intention of the fight is to convey your message not hurt your loved ones.Even bitter enemies like India and Pakistan have ROE(Rules Of Engagement) over battlefield and doesn’t fight like animals
      • Inflicting self pain..or hurting oneself during the fight is the biggest stupidest thing to do.It only forces the other person to come to a stalemate without true understanding.Nothing really achieved
Fighting Techniques
couple fighting
To lighten up the mood here are a few fighting techniques used during a fight.Due to my knowledge and vast field experience in this matter I present to you the “Technique de la Fighting Manual”.
  1. The Silent Treatment, when used forces the other half to go crazy.Makes him/her wonder what went wrong.They end up saying all sorts of thing and in the end get tired and calls for a truce.Name your terms.
  2. The Violent treatment, can result in biting,slapping,boxing and scratching..which eventually ignites the passion and voila the love is back.Note please don't practically try to hurt the other half badly..its not a boxing match..knockout is not the way of winning.
  3. The Slang Treatment.I was fortunate enough to listen to a  good conversation where each one was just abusing the other.First it sounded very cheap but at the end I realized they actually have made up.
  4. The Emotional Atyachar Treatment.Boy o boy this is a big one.If done in limited dose and proper usage can leave the opponent in a dazzled state and once again you have the victory at your feet.
Making up
making up
Making up is a unique thing once again, different for different people.I will list the most common types.Once again my vision is limited to that being a male species so cant really say the same will work for boys from girls…so read on..
  • The I Love You Phrase.If used in proper fashion and good timing can lead to cool down.Add I’m dying and cant leave with out you adds perfect 100% to the score.
  • Pampering.When used against any other person is normally called buttering or oiling.The motive here is to say nice things to the other half(even if it is not true)
  • Guchu Guchu.In face to face fight..guchu technique can also lead to instant cool down.I don't think i need to explain this in details..but for dummies, get more passionate..dumb
  • Chocolates and Red Roses are known to be good anti fighting agents but not recommended for budget lovers.
  • Stuffed Toys.If budget permits can add to cool down.
While the subject is widely discussed and there is no real guideline to it.The best thing to remember is what really matters.Is it your loved one or is it your ego.Its up to you to save your relationship and you know the best how to do it.My article simply urges you to do it.

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